You’ve been dating for some time now, and you want to know if it’s serious. The best way is to have a direct conversation with the person in question. You should be able to speak openly and honestly with them, even if one or both of you are on the more timid side. Communication in relationships isn’t dictated by how extroverted someone is, but on how comfortable and willing the two people are in letting each other into their own lives. Below you’ll find 10 signs that you’re NOT his (or their) priority. Look, you don’t have to be his only priority, but if you feel like the relationship is unbalanced, then it probably is. We hope that these don’t sound familiar, but if a handful of them do, then it might not be worth the few good moments you have together.This is a clear red flag. Sure, things will happen that will prevent him from being able to see you, but if it happens more than just a few times, then this is not a good sign. After all the time and energy you’ve set aside for him, if he’s going to cancel on you, it should only be for a very good reason. He should at least have the courtesy to reschedule, and if he doesn’t, then drop him.
Even when he really lets you down, you always make excuses for him. “He’s just really busy” or “he’s just really shy” can only last for so long. While you shouldn’t let your friends make decisions for you, if they’re turned of by his behavior, then don’t assume that “they just don’t know him.” Try to think outside of your head and decide for yourself whether or not you’re being treated fairly.
If you’ve already established that you’re looking for something serious and he continues to casually date other people or is still hung up on an ex, don’t play yourself into thinking that they’re the other girl. You’re just another option to him, and you shouldn’t be treated that way at all.
It’s one thing to be spontaneous and another for you to always be part of his last-minute plans. This is especially true if he constantly contacts you at indecent hours. You might be tempted into thinking that he’s sweet, which can be true in some cases, but more than likely, he hit you up because he was bored or wanted that one thing.
You know it’s starting to get serious if he invites you to an important event, whether it be a family Christmas party or a graduation. If you find yourself only being invited to more casual outings, then it’s probably because he considers it a casual relationship. Patience is a virtue, and foolishness is not. Use common sense and don’t prioritize him if he is isn’t doing the same for you.
Yes, there are some cases when planning is part of your personality but if you’re the only one making plans, then you might be getting the short end of the stick. Relationships should be balanced. If you find that there are no plans unless you make them, then chances are that he is extremely lazy (and do you want that?) or doesn’t know your worth (you definitely don’t want that).
You know his childhood hero, favorite drink, and his siblings’ names, but if you’ve shared similar information with him and he is constantly asking you like it’s the first time, maybe he’s just not that into you. When you’re genuinely interested in someone, you tend to soak in these details early on. They’re like little presents that bring you closer together.
Your kindness, patience, and thoughtfulness toward him goes unappreciated. If you speak up about the fact that he doesn’t put in an equal amount of effort and he responds by calling you “needy” or something equivalent, then the two of you just aren’t on the same page. Don’t think that you need to do more. This is never the case. He’s simply not there yet, and you should trust your instincts on evaluating whether or not he could ever be.
Some folks prioritize their jobs, friends, or families, which are all things to respect, but we all set aside time for the people we care about, especially our love interests. Life isn’t a fairytale, but if he does not treat you well or offer you his genuine attention (for example, you’re constantly waiting for him to text or call you back, if at all), then don’t expect that to change anytime soon.
Your feelings are one of the strongest indicators in your relationship. Dating and relationships are never easy, but if you find yourself hurt more than happy, then just get yourself out of there. You’re beautiful and if someone makes you forget that for a second, then you don’t need them.