Being a parent is definitely one of the most rewarding jobs out there, but it certainly comes with quite a few downfalls. Nights full of sleep, date nights, and showers are just a few of the things that change as soon as you bring a little one into your family. While these things can be unbelievably frustrating, there’s no denying that they’re truthfully hilarious.Unfortunately, children don’t understand this. This is exactly the reason why having a good hair day is pretty much non-existent when you have children.
Even though you probably used to get a little rowdy on those sacred nights out with the girls, they probably didn’t look like this. Now, nights out consist of waking up to a kid’s butt in your face.
This dad, who was once a tough ladies’ man, is only trying to please one lady now. If you don’t wear pink bows for your daughter, are you even a dad?
When kids come along, though, working out looks much different. Instead of lifting weights and working on her core, this mama is lifting her kids and working on her patience.
After kids, partying all night consists of screaming babies, fevers and morning energy shots. Don’t forget about the 2 am diaper changes, instead of the 2 am chicken and waffles.
Once you have children, your beverage choices change just a little bit. As a parent, if you’re not on your fourth cup of coffee by 11 am what are you even doing with your life?
When you have children, makeup looks a little bit different. Instead of expensive eye shadow palettes and soft brushes, your makeup purchases consist of non-toxic paint and stickers.
Unfortunately, when you become a parent you meal choices are narrowed down a bit. Instead of meals consisting of lobster or steak, you find yourself suffering through dinners of chicken nuggets and mac-and-cheese.
When you don’t have children, the faster the car, the better. When you do have children, your only concern is whether or not there are enough cup holders.
Sadly, the moment your kids are born you have to find your excitement elsewhere. Instead of racing on a track, you can look forward to arcade racing and pizza parties.
Unless you want to look like Barack Obama at the end of his presidency, you should turn and run for the hills now.
While a lot of women used to look forward to swimsuit season, they’re now looking forward to the fall. Can anyone say oversized sweaters and pumpkin spice lattes?
On the other side of the spectrum, cohabitating with children is similar to living with a literal tornado. Experienced mothers know not to start cleaning until the end of the night when their children’s eyes have been closed for at least an hour.
This is a clear representation of every single parent who has a child young enough to be living in their home. Growling included.
When you marry someone and have kids with them, date nights are nonexistent. Say goodbye to rose petals and dancing, and say hello to Disney movies and 9 pm bedtimes.
Eventually, that tiny, sweet infant becomes a toddler, and then a teenager. And that’s when the parent realizes that they made the biggest mistake of their life.
And then you had babies at the same time, and you realized how very wrong you were. What you thought was going to be cute play dates and shopping trips, turned into wine-filled nights crying into each other’s laps.
After children, you need to press the snooze button 12 times, three cups of coffee, and 2 hours of silence before you’re ready to start the day.
Unfortunately, if you want to go on an impromptu road trip with children you need a whole lot of patience and a solid plan. Not to mention plenty of extra room for all of the unnecessary things that have to bring along for the ride.
It’s unfortunate, but after spending a couple of years with kids you look more like a mental health patient, rather than an image of perfect health.
But rather than do their own thing, they would prefer to race to their parent’s room to find out if it’s okay to jump off of the roof into the pool. Morningtime starts early for homes with children, especially if you don’t want to make a trip to the emergency room.
Well, in actuality, becoming a parent is essentially saying that you forfeit any and all alone time in the bathroom. Hey, at least you only have to do this for 18 years, right?
It’s almost as if there’s a secret code for children that tells them to destroy anything that may look like it was expensive or well-liked. If you’re planning on having kids, hide your breakables and buy some couch covers.
There’s no getting a tan or lounging with a good book. No, once you have children, spending time in the pool consists of water fights, eyes filled with chlorine, and emergency runs to the bathroom.
